Do you feel like the only person in your circle of friends who is single? Maybe you are feeling a little lonely and want to be in a relationship. Have you been told that "it's your time?" Or maybe, even worse, have you ever felt pressure to settle for someone because it looks like no one else wants to date or marry you? This blog post will talk about embrace singleness with tips on how to embrace the life stage as a single Christian woman. Maybe single isn't your choice, but embrace it with joy.
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Be intentional about how you spend time alone: Rather than feeling like something is wrong and being unhappy, be by yourself, embrace the fact that this season of singleness should be spent in worship to God and enjoying Him on our own. It helps to create a routine by getting in the word of God every day. Just like we can get on the phone and talk to our girlfriends about everything every day, we can swap some of that time and get into worship. I guarantee when you start this routine, you will find yourself less on the phone with your girlfriend. He wants us to walk and talk to him. I find getting up before work and my son getting up in the morning to walk for an hour. I listen to the word on YouTube, replay church sermons or a podcast on my walks. Then I go into a little of worship and have a good conversation with God. I can clear my mind with clutter, get some things off my chest and be intentional about what I ask my father. He wants us to build a father-daughter relationship.
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The Gift of Singleness: Tips to Embrace the Life Stage for Single Christian Women
Love God First: It may sound cliche, but embrace the opportunity to love Him even more. We should be intentional about going to church every Sunday and spending time in prayer with him throughout the week. One of my favorite bible verses is "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life." (John 3:16). When we put God first and be intentional in our prayer, he will take care of us and give us the desires of our hearts. I get very emotional when I hear this scripture because I can see the picture of Jesus on the cross who died for me (unperfect me). As I am writing this post, I am getting all teary-eyed and choked up with emotions. I know God forgives us of ALL of our sins and never throws it back at us, but I know now that God is my first love because he unconditionally loves me no matter how many times I mess up. I know to LOVE him first.
Love Yourself: We should be intentional about loving ourselves too. Being single, we can take care of ourselves and focus on what God wants for us this season, not some man's idea or desire for you. Make sure that your self-worth is not based on whether a man loves you. I am a strong woman, but at times, we fall into the trap of relationships that is not of God and our self-worth. I, at a time, was afraid to let go of a relationship of the fear of starting over and making others happy and sacrificing my happiness. Since letting go of the idolatry of having a man (not equally yolked), I am happier than I have ever been and embrace my singleness.
Find your Purpose: We should find our calling in life as single people, whether working at the church or volunteering at organizations that impact others, to name a few. Being intentional about finding out what we are passionate about can help keep us fulfilled with meaning while also being single. If you need to go back to school to get your college degree, it is not too LATE! I did not want to finish college because I did not like school, but God made a way to get me back there, and doors started to open up at my job. Sometimes he has you doing things you don't want to do, and you have no clue why, but trust and believe, he has a plan. His plan is always the best. Do not question it. Trust the process.
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.
Psalm 147: 5 Great is our Lord, and abundant in power; His understanding is beyond measure.
When we embrace these three things as a single woman, it will help us grow spiritually and allow us to find contentment in this season.
Find out your Passion and Embrace the Gift of Singleness. Have a Good Laugh: Sometimes, it can help have someone else make us laugh or watch a funny movie. There are some great movies about single people that I recommend checking out, like Single Moms Club or any other comedy movie! When we bring laughter to ourselves, it helps in the healing of the heart. I use to watch movies that would make me cry because it reminded me of, say, for example, and break up, and it draws of feelings like, what was I thinking when I did this or how did I put myself in that situation? Then I would stop and say, "God, take these thoughts out of my head." God already fixed it. Why do we go back at it again? So I started to surround myself with happiness and laughter. It helped me to think about the good stuff rather than the messiness of the past.
Focus on Your Purpose: Sometimes, people think they have to get married to embrace their purpose. You can either change your mindset or live a life of regret that you never found out what God has called you to do for His Kingdom. We were born for a reason, and God created seasons, not just for the weather. These different seasons can be likened to life, winter, spring, summer, and fall. A growing season is a year when crops and other plants grow successfully. The length of a growing season varies from place to place. Most crops need a growing season of at least 90 days. When it comes to the season God has us in, the time varies. We cannot control seasons; you can only control yourself in the season. We have to take our time to understand that it will benefit us in the seasons when rightly applied. The seasons and times of life can be changed depending on what we are doing in that season God has us in at the time.
Daniel 2:21 And He changes the times and He seasons; He removes kings and raises up kings; He gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to those who have understanding.
Enjoy the Beauty of Singleness: One way we can embrace our singleness is by doing some self-care. It is important to embrace the beauty of our singleness and live life with joy?practice self-care by doing something for yourself once in a while. Go hang out with some single Christian friends. I love treating myself to a massage. I recently went to Sojo Spa, and I fell in love. I plan to do this every other month. Guess what? It is time for one this month!
Slow down: I know this can be difficult, but it helps to slow down so that we don't miss out on what God has for us. We are in a society that moves fast, and sometimes we do not think about things before we do them. God does things indecent and order, and if he did not give you the go ahead to do it, slow down and wait on him. Do you think you will miss out on something? NOPE! God does things for our good ALL THE TIME!
Ask God for Direction: When you live your life with singleness, we must ask the Lord to show us what His will and plan are for our lives so that we can embrace them fully. We cannot embrace something if we don't know about it first. Some of us get into predicaments because we have not fully understood and embraced the season we are in - some of us are in our singleness. Ask God for direction and to order your footsteps.
Get to know yourself better: When we embrace our singleness, we must embrace the life stage and get to know ourselves. We may be surprised at what we find. What are your passions? Do you like children or not so much? Are you more of a night person or an early morning type? We must know these things before we jump into something and find out that we don't like it so much. How is God going to prepare you for your mate if you don't know yourself fully?
Singleness is a gift that should be embraced and not just endured. The life stage brings many challenges and many opportunities to grow in faith, explore new passions, and get involved in community activities you may have never done before. This week's blog post was all about tips for embracing the single Christian woman's life stage ? we hope you found some of these helpful! Don't hesitate to reach out if you are looking for more ways to enjoy your singleness or need someone to talk things through with who understands what being single on purpose looks like. Our team would love nothing more than to hear from our readers and helping them live their best lives as single women following Christ! One great way we can do this is by connecting with us. Join us on Friday afternoon for the ?Friday Lunchtime Prayer Call,? an opportunity to pray together over the phone about anything going on in our lives. Reach out today and email us at eysos2018@gmail.com so we can get started connecting! You can also join our singles ministry group here.
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Be Blessed. Be Beautiful. Be Empowered.
Teekwa Scarborough
Business Christian Coach
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